It is my pleasure to introduce to you Heather Martin.
She is my first guest blogger and I think we all have so much we can learn from her.
The way we envision our lives is most often not the way it turns out to be. We grow up being told to get an education and go to college. We are told to find someone with great ambitions, marry them, and have a happy family. It sounded pretty easy to me until I was actually trying to attain those goals.. Never once did I imagine the nights where I would be up until 4am just making sure my assignments were perfect and turned in on time, or making sure my checking account had the correct amount of money for my credit card payment so I wouldn’t be charged with an overdraft fee.
I also never quite intended to find myself pregnant at 20 years old.
We took your test three times and it came back positive.
In that moment I felt like my life was over. I wanted to escape to another world and never come back. In that moment I saw two paths in front of me. The first path was one that the world and the culture around me were screaming for me to go down. A path that looked so incredibly easy, but a path that ultimately ended in heartbreak and death. The second path was one that not many choose to follow. The path looked long and difficult but ended with life and joy.
In that moment I was battling against my own selfish desires. I could choose the “quick fix path” and no one would ever know or I could take the hard path, the right path and be looked down upon by many and shamed by many. But In that moment I came to the realization that it wasn’t really a choice. I couldn’t end a life just for my own convenience.. So I decided to be brave and I chose the hard path.
And let me tell you, the path was hard. I don’t think I have ever cried as much I did those long 9 months. I felt alone and scared. I was in pain, physically and emotionally.
But in the midst of all of that the Lord remained faithful to me and never left my side, not even for a moment.
He walked with me when I didn’t think I could handle all the pain and when I couldn’t even fathom the thought of taking another step He scooped me up and carried me. He forgave me when I couldn’t even forgive myself. He surrounded me with loving and supportive family and friends to help me through my trials and to push me forward along my path. There were days when I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel and wondered if I had chosen the right path. In those moments God would always give me some type of reassurance of my decision, whether it was a timely kick from my little peanut inside of me, or a text message of encouragement from a random friend or a song on the radio.
As I sit here today looking at my little girl, I am reminded of God’s forgiveness and grace.
“Man plans his way but the Lord directs his steps.” Proverbs 16:9
This is not the way I would have planned my life but I am so thankful to serve a God who loves me and forgives me and has my whole life planned out for me. A perfect plan that He has orchestrated from before the beginning of time. He knew that I needed Norah and that she needed me and I am so thankful to God for my tiny little blessing. I didn’t know it was possible to love someone so much, to have someone so small just steal your heart with one little cry.
Now that I have seen the light at the end of the path I will never question whether I made the right decision or not and every time I look at my sweet Norah’s face I will thank the Lord for his mercy and for His perfect plan.
being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ;
If you or someone you know is pregnant here are some resources for Christian help and support